The Mouse on Wall Street

By Leonard Wibberley

By no means has "the cash game" been extra deliciously uncovered than during this creative comedy-satire. Grand Fenwick's mystery weapon this time is its Grand Pinot chewing gum. on the end of its successful conflict opposed to the U.S., the duchy had lodged production rights to the product in an American corporation, the place that they had lain dormant. yet now the anti-smoking crusade is in complete tilt, gum revenues have boomed, and Grand Fenwick gets a payment, unheralded and undesirable, for a million dollars-its forty consistent with cent proportion of the 1st annual revenue. What consternation! For definitely not anything strong may end up from the inflow of these unneeded cash into the tidy economic system of Grand Fenwick (15 sq. miles; 5000 souls). And certainly the consternation is definitely based. 365 days later, the ills of inflation already afflicting each Grand Fenwickian, excessive or low, Conservative or hard work, the revenue fee isn't really 1000000 cash, yet ten million. Now simply the benign Gloriana XII can shop her humans, and proposal is the same as the perilous second. opting for to lose the money by means of making an investment it on Wall road, she closes her eyes-a vintage method-and jabs on the monetary web page together with her embroidery needle. Then, having airmailed off to the States a purchase for inventory within the corporation her needle has skewered, she settles again with ease and expectantly to her embroidery. basically Gloriana XII is not any monetary genius, and, after all, her scheme is going awry. yet simply how so is an issue for Mr. Wibberley's risible ingenuity and for his readers. Suffice it to claim right here that mergers merge, conglomerates conglomerate, and in the end the entire funds markets of the area start to wobble. For what if Grand Fenwick may still liquidate its billions-yes, they're billions now-of American resources and insist cost in gold?

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What in God's identify do they suggest through that? What a frightful option to think about humans. 'Consuming public' Like boa constrictors swallowing every thing that's installed entrance of them. " Having relieved his emotions in a point by means of this outburst, the count number persisted analyzing the letter: you're certainly conscious of the hot file of the health care provider common of the USA detailing the connection among cigarette smoking and lung melanoma in addition to melanoma of the bladder, restrict and hardening of the kidneys . . . "Damn," acknowledged the count number of Mountjoy. "What is it approximately american citizens that they could make anatomical information sound so revolting? 'Cancer of the bladder. ' i have controlled to dwell for over three-quarters of a century with no even acknowledging the life of my bladder. those confounded everyone is in love with their insides. " He threw the letter to the ground, the place it fell face down, and he gave it a kick along with his foot as he went to the bellpull to inform his guy to convey him a clean pot of tea and a few toasted Hovis bread and a pot of marmalade. In being kicked the letter flipped over, and out of the only sheet of a white paper a determine preceded by way of a buck signal appeared to jump at him. He overlooked it, considering that this used to be most likely a few allure for a donation to assist ahead the yankee anti-smoking campaign. Then, while his tea and his toast were dropped at him, the importance of the identify on which he have been ruminating got here to him. Bickster and corporate, he now recalled, have been the folk within the usa who have been approved to fabricate and promote the Pinot Grand Fenwick chewing gum, which that they had controlled to do for therefore a long time with no bothering anyone within the Duchy! Intrigued, the count number picked up the letter once again and, ignoring extra paragraphs detailing how americans have been switching from smoking to chewing, pounced at the final paragraph, which learn: overall revenues of Pinot Grand Fenwick chewing gum within the usa final 12 months, after deduction of producing, dispensing, and ads bills, and in addition placing apart a reserve for additional merchandising and fee of country and federal taxes, confirmed a revenue of $2,500,000. lower than the phrases of our contract with yourselves, wherein you're to obtain forty percentage of the earnings, as that time period is outlined in Article 14, subsection a, of that contract, you're to obtain the sum of $1,000,000, which now we have excitement in sending to you thru Lloyd's financial institution in London. ... The count number learn no extra. The hand during which he held the letter trembled a little. a section of toast, weighted down with marmalade, which he used to be conveying to his mouth remained in midair, arrested in mid-voyage, because the count number grasped the importance of what he had learn. "One million dollars," he cried. "One million money? it really is an outrage. A confounded outrage, an unwarranted, deliberate, and dastardly invasion of our thoroughly balanced economic climate. these blackguards will wreck us. 2 It was once the count number of Mountjoy's behavior, whilst faced with any hindrance, to do not anything for per week yet give it some thought and carefully sound out others for his or her opinion at the subject.

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